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‘In so many ways, to me, purity culture equals rape culture.’
This woman made a vagina sculpture out of chastity rings as part of her ongoing message to women to live shamelessly.
‘In the ‘90s—’90s and early 2000s—there was this thing called the purity movement. And they would give girls what are called—and it still happens today—purity rings. And often, the way this would go down, is that their dad would come with some flowers and she would get all dressed up, and they’d go to a daddy/daughter dance. And he would put a ring on her 11-year-old hand and she would promise to not have—she would promise her dad that she wouldn’t have sex before another man put a different ring on her finger on her wedding day, before she even knew really what sex was, who she was, or what she wanted.’
Pastor and advocate Nadia Bolz-Weber collected approx 170 chastity rings from women across the U.S. through a call out on Twitter. Bolz-Weber is the author of two New York Times bestselling memoirs. In 2019, she released her new book ‘Shameless: A Sexual Reformation,’ which examines Christianity’s ideas about sex and gender.
‘Your sexuality never belonged to your dad or your husband or your girlfriend. Your sexuality has always belonged to you.’
Bolz-Weber grew up in a conservative environment.
‘I was raised in Colorado Springs in a military family. We were part of a church community which is called the Church of Christ, and it was very, very conservative. So conservative, it was—I never heard a woman pray out loud in front of other people ‘til I was 27 years old, because women were not allowed to be leaders. They couldn’t even really be ushers at the church, much less be a preacher or pray out loud.’
In 2008, she started her own church called the House for All Sinners and Saints in Denver, CO. She says the church now counts approx 600 members.
‘It’s filled full of people who don’t look like they should be in church, which to me is perfect. I felt like any church I showed up to, they might be friendly, but they didn’t feel welcoming in the sense that I feel this pressure to watch my language, and don’t let people know I have a dark sense of humor, or that I have the past that I have, or that I have the opinions I have, or whatever, and it’s exhausting to do that. And so I wanted to start a church that I didn’t have to culturally commute to show up to and neither did other people..’
Bolz-Weber left the House for All Sinners and Saints in 2018
‘I didn’t want it to have founder’s syndrome, which is a thing where the founder of an organization kinda stays too long and kinda messes it up ‘cause they can’t let it go.
‘I think grace is so powerful that I want people to be able to access the truth of themselves. And the irony about shame is it actually keeps us from the reality of the things we might need to address, because shame is so powerful we want it all to stay hidden. How can it be healed if it’s always hidden?’
#Purity #Virginity #Feminism
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